Saturday, March 31, 2007

Peanut butter disproves evolution

Sorry, only a few games left and my chance to impart important information.

I was just innocently sitting here eating peanut butter on Ritz crackers - how could I have foreseen what this meant for all of mankind.

http://scienceblogs.com/mikethemadbiologist/2007/03/creationist_sez_peanut_butter.php

Pompoms, Pyramids and Peril


Just something to keep in mind, as we cheer our teams to victory.

From NY Times
Emergency room visits for cheerleading injuries nationwide have more than doubled since the early 1990s, and the rate of life-threatening injuries has startled researchers.

How startled are they, really?

Friday, March 30, 2007

Meathead all the way!



As I see it, I've got as much chance winning rootin' for the Meathead Supermans as for my first picks.

Who picked whom? In basketball. In the pool. You know, this weekend? Final Four?

Dear Multitudes,

Sorry, I've been a little absent this week. Very little hoop chatter. I gather everyone's gearing up for the Final Four with beer, pizza, chili and loose fitting jeans. Every year about this time I promise to send out a list of the Final Four picks. I usually neglect (or forget) to actually do so. Not this year, brothers and sisters. Remember that semifinal games are worth 8 points, picking the champ gets you 10. It's a wide open field, as the picks table will show you. Here 'tis:


Player R4 Totals Runner Up Champ
1. Bill 98 UCLA OSU
2. Matt 86 UCLA Gtown
2. Silet 86 Gtown Florida
4. Knott 84 Florida Gtown
6. Liz 80 Florida Gtown
7. Mike 78 Florida OSU
8. Hank 76 Oregon UNC
8. John 76 UNC Florida
8. Kate 76 Florida OSU
11. DaveW 74 Florida Gtown
11. Gena 74 UCLA Memphis
11. Ruth 74 Memphis Florida
14. DavidP 73 Florida OSU
15. Calvino 71 OSU Kansas
15. Henry 71 Gtown Kansas
17. Dayle 69 Memphis Florida
17. Dykes 69 TX A&M Florida
19. Steve 67 OSU Florida
20. Alexander 57 OSU Old Dom.
20. Dana 57 UVA UCLA
22. Sarah 55 Wash. St Pitt
23. Rosalie 50 Kansas Penn
24. Maggi 45 Kansas UNC
25. Acy 44 UNC Maryland
26. Willow 35 USC Kansas

Good luck out there.

Poolmeister

Monday, March 26, 2007

Jack and Dick


For what it's worth - Nixon was born January 9th. Me? The 8th along with Elvis.

Liz, Bill and Knott sandbagged by the Grey Lady

OK, so the three supergeniuses who picked all of the Final Four teams correctly wake up this morning feeling pretty good about themselves. Leaping Liz Ramblin' Rambeau, Billy Bob Limey-pants Lafcadio O'Hearn, and Chris "Stud among horses, man among mice" Knott wander down to their respective breakfast tables for a quick bite and a glance at the front page of the New York Times, when their eyes, disbelieving, fall on this piece of journalistic crap:

SO YOU PICKED THE FINAL FOUR? JOIN THE CLUB

Well, bite me, New York Times. Here's the link.


I shouldn't have to put up with this. I'm not going to win the pool, for once in my stinking life I picked all the Final Four teams, and now I have the NYT mocking me. The NYT!!! They wouldn't know sports if sports bit them in the underwear, and now they have the temerity to mock me? (I mean, of course, us.)

Sheesh, I may have to reconsider my subscription. First, no comics, now this. What's up, Sulzberger?

C

Standing after the regional finals

Dear cavaliers and roundheads,

So, the Final Four is set. Three of us (Liz, Bill and yours truly) picked all four teams correctly. Aren't you embarrassed? Bill is now a limey, living in England, no access to American hoop. I am a skirt-wearing, damp-eyed nancy-boy who knows the names of more dead Polish mezzo-sopranos than tournament point guards. Liz picks games based on strength of English Department, quality of novels set in each school's state, and architectural interest of campus buildings. What I'm saying here is that the people who know the most about hoop didn't get the Final Four right, and the three of us hackers did. Shame on you.

Anyway, the Silet threat seems to have passed, Favs is out of the tournament, Bill is crushing the field, and Maggi has been mathematically eliminated from any chance of finishing better than me. It's a funny old world.

Here's where we are:

--------------Sat---Sun--Total
1. Bill 86 12 98
2. Matt 74 12 86
2. Silet 74 12 86
4. Knott 72 12 84
5. Favs 76 6 82
6. Liz 68 12 80
7. Mike 72 6 78
8. Hank 76 0 76
8. John 70 6 76
8. Kate 70 6 76
11. DaveW 62 12 74
11. Gena 74 0 74
11. Ruth 62 12 74
14. DavidP 67 6 73
15. Calvino 65 6 71
15. Henry 59 12 71
17. Dayle 63 6 69
17. Dykes 63 6 69
19. Steve 61 6 67
20. Alexander 51 6 57
20. Dana 57 0 57
22. Sarah 55 0 55
23. Rosalie 44 6 50
24. Maggi 45 0 45
25. Acy 44 0 44
26. Willow 35 0 35


Anyone still interested? In the tournament, I mean? (The pool never pales, of course.) I don't really care who wins the championship, I'm ashamed to say. I wish I did, but I feel as though I don't really have any emotional tie to any of these teams. I'll watch the last three games, but I probably won't yell myself hoarse as I have in some years past. Maybe I'm just getting old.

Don't send congrats to Bill just yet. There are a few ways in which someone could overtake him. Keep your eye on Mr. Liz, Matt Peterson, our most Kennedyesque entrant. He's sitting nicely in second, and is poised to snatch the lead from Bill, who may or may not be our most Nixonesque entrant. I'll send around a message outlining who picked whom when I get a second.

Behave yourselves.

C

Sunday, March 25, 2007

Mike Hunt's dentist located in West Haven, CT


Our mighty Jayhawks vanquished, or, rather, mine, since S went to a somewhat tonier school...and unable to find any 3.2 beer, we went shopping in beautiful West Haven.

(S now harassing me for using 'vanquished.' Similar to harassment I received last night for playing 'Wings over America' at high volume after R and W had gone to sleep.)

OBGYN love

Steve and I received a bottle opener where a Bushism is released every time you open a beer. But this I just could n't believe really happened, but, yes, sadly yes.

Oh yeah, go UNLV!

Sunday's picks

Friends,

I'm going quickly here. I'm on my own with Alexander, who loves to bang on the laptop keyboard. Acy is in a play today (she's awesome, by the way) and Maggi's in the audience. Wish me luck here.

Two games today. Let's see who picked whom:


1. Florida - Everybody and his brother
3. Oregon - Gena, Hank, Sarah
------------------------------
2. Wisconsin - Maggi, Willow
7. UNLV - Dana
4. Maryland - Acy
12 Old Dominion - Alexander


1. UNC - Maggi, John, Hank, Calvino, Kate, Mike, Acy, Gena, Favs
2. GTown - Knott, Acy, Scott, Bill, DaveW, Liz, Matt, Ruth, Henry
---------------------------------------------------------------
3. Washington State - Steve, Sarah
8. Marquette - Dana
4. Texas - Dykes, DavidP
7. BC - Rosalie
5. USC - Willow


Whew, I made it. Of course, he's in a heap, bawling his eyes out, but at least I've finished Pool business for a while. First things first, right? Now, more Elmo.

C

Results and standings after Saturday's games

Folks,

We're getting down to it, and the wheat is starting to get firmly separated from us chaff. Yesterday, there were only two games, with UCLA and Ohio State making it out of their regions and into the Final Four. Remember that regional final picks are worth 6 points each, national semifinal games worth 8 and picking the champ right gets you 10. Based on that, yesterday's games were worth a total of 12 points. 5 of us got both of them right; Bill (now crushing the field), Liz, Hank, The Wrinkler and, well, little old me. Aw, shucks.

Here's where we are after yesterday:

-------------R3-----Sat---Total
1. Bill 74 12 86
2. Favs 70 6 76
2. Hank 64 12 76
4. Gena 68 6 74
4. Matt 68 6 74
4. Silet 74 0 74
7. Knott 60 12 72
7. Mike 60 12 72
9. John 70 0 70
9. Kate 64 6 70
11. Liz 56 12 68
12. DavidP 61 6 67
13. Calvino 59 6 65
14. Dayle 63 0 63
14. Dykes 57 6 63
16. DaveW 56 6 62
16. Ruth 62 0 62
18. Steve 55 6 61
19. Henry 59 0 59
20. Dana 51 6 57
21. Sarah 49 6 55
22. Alexander 45 6 51
23. Maggi 45 0 45
24. Acy 44 0 44
24. Rosalie 44 0 44
26. Willow 35 0 35

Today's picks will be out as soon as I can peel the dumb baby off me. Don't hold your collective breaths.

C

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Saturday's picks

Guys and dolls,

Only two games today, Kansas v. UCLA and OSU v. Memphis. (When did Memphis College become Memphis State University, and when did Memphis State University become University of Memphis? Read your Paul Fussell if you want to know why it happened.) We're pretty evenly split on these games, so expect some movement in the standings.

By the way, among the notable absences from the pool this year I did want to particularly call out Big Calvin, Cal Dewitt. His wife Ruth, and sons Henry and Calvino are steaming through the field. But where's Cal? Here's my theory; concomitant with his leftward political drift has come increased fecklessness, flip-floppery and wobbly-kneed weakness similar to his new political allies. Welcome to the left, Cal. What we have here, in short, is that Col. DeWitt has cut and run from the pool. Next thing you know, he'll be watching basketball with John Murtha, Jane Fonda and John Kerry. We lefties are pleased to have you, and let me know if you need to know where to find Air America on your radio dial.

Here are the picks:

1. Kansas - Maggi, Ruth, Calvino, Henry, Rosalie, Willow, John, DavidP, Kate, Scott, Favs
2. UCLA - Knott, Gena, Dana, Dykes, Wrinkler, Bill, Liz, Matt, Hank
---------------------------------------------
3. Pitt - Steve, DaveW, Sarah
6. Duke - Acy (homer pick)
10. Gonzaga - Alexander (I think Z is his favorite letter).
4. Southern Illinois - Dayle



1. Ohio State - Thirteen of us
2. Memphis - Gena, Acy, Ruth, Dayle, John
-----------------------------------------------------------------
9. XU - Maggi
4. UVA - Dana
3. TX A&M - Dykes, Scott, Matt, Henry (the He-man's club with their He-man team)
14. Penn - Rosalie, Willow

And there you have it. All I care about now is finishing ahead of my bride. Keep your fingers crossed for me, please.

C

Results and standings after Round Three

Dudes and dudettes,

Round three is over, and what a weird outcome; 4 1-seeds, 3 2-seeds and a 3-seed. I'm too lazy to find out, even though I'm sitting at the computer, but can anyone remember a result like this? Makes picking a little strange, and skews the results in the sense that Favs is way up at the top.

Bill, Scott, John, Gena, Hank and The Wrinkler all picked all four of yesterday's games correctly. That's amazing for this late in the tourney. As you can see, Bill and Scott remain deadlocked at the top. John is in an epic battle with Favs (Favs disappears after tomorrow, of course), so John's looking good. I'll have to go back to review what the Rules Committee decided about late round points, but the thing to remember is there's lots of room for movement still, so don't concede anything to your spouse, friend, child, parent, etc. There's plenty of play left in the game.

So, after 56/63 of the tourney has passed, here's where we stand:

------------Thu----Fri--- R3
1. Bill 62 12 74
1. Silet 62 12 74
3. Favs 61 9 70
3. John 58 12 70
5. Gena 56 12 68
5. Matt 59 9 68
7. Hank 52 12 64
7. Kate 55 9 64
9. Dayle 57 6 63
10. Ruth 53 9 62
11. DavidP 55 6 61
12. Knott 51 9 60
12. Mike 48 12 60
14. Calvino 50 9 59
14. Henry 50 9 59
16. Dykes 51 6 57
17. DaveW 47 9 56
17. Liz 47 9 56
19. Steve 52 3 55
20. Dana 48 3 51
21. Sarah 46 3 49
22. Alexander 42 3 45
22. Maggi 39 6 45
24. Acy 38 6 44
24. Rosalie 38 6 44
26. Willow 32 3 35


Today's picks coming soon.

xoxox,

C

Friday, March 23, 2007

translation, please

What exactly does it mean when the commentators say with delirious excitement:

"Now that shows the importance of dribble penetration!"

At the wall....


After your rant Chris it seemed that a visual of some sort is in order to add a little flavour....

Der Pikens auf der Freitag (how's that?)

Meine Gute Freundes (I learned German from Hogan's Heroes, you know),

Ah, Friday, what is so rare as a lazy Friday in the office, knowing there are 4 potentially interesting tournament games to look forward to? OK, so not all of them are likely to be interesting, but at least the potential is there. I have opened up a little distance between myself and the estimable Maggi Jackson, and the mockery may be soon to begin, another beautiful beautiful thing to look forward to. Egad, the world's all lovely sometimes.

Back to bidness. Who picked whom? Well, sisters and brothers, see below:

Let's have a safe Round Three out there.

C


1. Florida - The multitudes
5. Butler - Nobody. Zip. Nada squata potata.
--------------------------------------
4. Maryland - Maggi, Acy, Sarah
12. Old Dominion - Alexander (he's 16 months old. What does he know?)



3. Oregon - Knott, Gena, Mike, Scott, Bill, DaveW, Matt, Hank, Sarah, Rosalie, John, DavidP
7. UNLV - Dana (Go Dana!!!)
------------------------------------------------------------------------
2. Wisconsin - Maggi, Favs, Steve, Acy, Kate, Liz, Ruth, Calvino, Henry, Dayle, Willow
15. TX A&M-CC - Alexander (see comment above)
10. Georgia Tech - Dykes


1. UNC - Opie, Goober, Aunt Bea and the rest of the field
5. USC - Rosalie, Willow (what do they know that the rest of us don't?)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
4. Texas - Knott, Steve, Dykes, DaveW, Matt, Sarah, DavidP
8. Marquette - Dana, Alexander



2. Georgetown - Most folks
6. Vanderbilt - Dayle (Go Commodores! Go Dayle!)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
3. Washington State - Steve, Dana, Sarah, DavidP
7. BC - Rosalie, Willow


And there you have it. Don't double dip the chips tonight, and quit lipping the 40 ouncer. We all have to drink out of that.

Poolmeister

Thursday night results and standings to this point

Friends,

Good games last night, but let's face it, a boring outcome. Two 1-seeds and two 2-seeds in the regional finals? Yawn. Big genius (but with a cautionary footnote) is Bill O'Hearn, who picked all four winners corrrectly. Here's the footnote: sure, Bill, you picked all the games right. And I know, I know, a correct pick is a correct pick. Still, isn't it a little cheap to rocket into a tie for first place because you picked matching 1-2 regional finals? Don't you feel, well, dirty? Cheap? No? Just happy to be winning. Well, I guess I get that. You Etonians and your playing field ethos. It won you Waterloo and it seems likely to win you the pool. And Britons never never never shall be slaves.

I think I started ranting a little right there. Sorry, the tread on my mind's tires isn't what it used to be. I need chains or steel-belted radials to keep my mind from slipping off the road. Where we was was that I was fixing to tell you the standings. And here they is:

------------R2---Thursday--Total
1. Bill 50 12 62
1. Silet 56 6 62
3. Favs 49 12 61
4. Matt 50 9 59
5. John 49 9 58
6. Dayle 51 6 57
7. Gena 47 9 56
8. DavidP 49 6 55
8. Kate 46 9 55
10. Ruth 47 6 53
11. Hank 43 9 52
11. Steve 46 6 52
13. Dykes 42 9 51
13. Knott 42 9 51
15. Calvino 41 9 50
15. Henry 44 6 50
17. Dana 42 6 48
17. Mike 39 9 48
19. DaveW 41 6 47
19. Liz 38 9 47
21. Sarah 40 6 46
22. Alexander 33 9 42
23. Maggi 36 3 39
24. Acy 32 6 38
24. Rosalie 32 6 38
26. Willow 29 3 32


In a moment, I'll send out the Friday picks.

Ta,

C

Thursday, March 22, 2007

My new rule



Just gotta click on the little box. You're all gonna want one.

Don't let the doorknob hit you...

Alford to New Mexico!!! My beloved Iowa Hawkeyes have received manna from heaven. Their miserable, pin-headed, loser dork of a "coach" Steve Alford, seems to have packed up his hair product and hit the road to New Mexico. What a relief. Our long national nightmare is over.

Now let's get ourselves a real coach. Less product, more production.

Breathing deep sighs of sweet relief,

Your man from Hawkeyetown

Thursday night picks

People,

Well, well, a few days of dreary workaday life have interrupted our hoopishness. But now, it's back to the good stuff, the stuff that makes life worth the bother, the stuff that dreams are made of. Hoop, even though I'm hopelessly mired in the D+ section of the class, is still better than no hoop.

So, you may be wondering how others have picked. Below please find my own artless chart showing how we've all picked tonight's games.


1. Kansas - everybody else
4. Southern Illinois - Mike, DaveW, Dayle (I picked KS, but I'd love to see SIU win this)
------------------------------------------------------------
9. Villanova - Dana, Acy


2. UCLA - Everybody else
3. Pitt - Steve, DaveW, Ruth, Dayle, Sarah
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
6. Duke - Maggi, Acy, John, DavidP (Gee, I don't miss Duke, do you?)
10. Gonzaga - Alexander, Willow


1. Ohio State - Hell and sundry
5. Tennessee - Gena, Scott, Ruth, Rosalie
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
4. UVA - Dana, Henry
9. Xavier - Maggi, Willow


3. Texas A&M - Dykes, Scott, Kate, Matt, Calvino, Henry, Sarah, DavidP
2. Memphis - Everybody else
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
6. Louisville (what happened to these bums?) - Knott, Maggi, Liz, Hank
7. Nevada - Steve (a genius pick that just didn't quite work out)
14. Penn (average SATs too high to win in tourney) - Rosalie, Willow (both smart enough to attend Penn. Me too dumb)

Well, that's that. At this point, all I care about is finishing ahead of Maggi. I'm a small person, but I have clear goals in life. I will post this message text to the blog as well, but I'm growing weary of posting in two places. If you hermits would get your bad selves hooked into the blog we could dispense with all the email. Hoping against hope, I suppose. Feh.

Yours poolily,

CAK

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

I've got Moosehaven on My Mind

With six months or less to go on the job, I'm thinking ahead. Moosehaven - golfcarts, vans, tri's (what is a tri - a Harley with a side car? Not such a bad idea) But you need to check it out for yourselves. Men, you need to be Mooseheads, so that your wives can be eligible to live at Moosehaven. Something to consider.

Contact you after Sunday evening.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Just some entertainment before the hoops start again



Sorry Folks, I steared you wrong. You cannot, in fact, see this polinated work of art in its entirety, just three minutes worth. Which is really all you need.
Steve and I had the good fortune to see this masterpiece a while ago. What they don't show you in the poster is the orgasmatron that the "housewives" enter naked to get Beed. It's terrific, and educational, being as the Queen Bee is really an alien bee scientist who lures bad human men to her hive to suck out their....I don't know, honey or something.

A Boost to Get you Through the Week


Hi, I saw this a couple of weeks ago in the New Yorker. I haven't decided which is my favorite flavor.

Hope you are not feeling so low that even these drinks can't give you a boost.

Sunday results and standings after Round Two

All right, it's Sweet 16 time. Sadly, 48 of the tournament's 63 games are over. It goes by too quickly. Any sporting event that more or demands one to sit on the couch, eating Hint O'Crack Tostitos and drinking quarts of beer will always, I'm afraid, come around too infrequently and fly by too quickly. Such is the sad, fleeting bird of life, darkening the souls of those of us who live with a constant presentiment of loss. Still, b'gad, there're 15 games left, plenty of snacks yet to be consumed, and I understand they're still bottling spirits and plan to offer them for sale to the private citizenry, so perhaps the glass, metaphorically speaking, is really still half full. Life is beautiful, I guess.

Not so my picks, which, frankly, suck. Nothing at all beautiful about them. Most of you seem to be doing a damn sight better. Nuts to you. There weren't any tremendous upsets on Sunday, but there were some good games. When is the last time, I wonder, when there weren't any double digit seeds in the Sweet 16? If only there were a librarian handy, we'd know. Everybody picked Florida, almost everybody picked Kansas and Oregon. Slightly fewer (17/26) thought Memphis would make it this far. Half of us (you, not me) picked Tennessee over Virginia. 8 got USC right - (Maggi, Gena, Dana, Calvino, Henry, Dayle, Rosalie and Willow). 9 got Southern Illinois - (favs, Alexander, Mike, Scott, DaveW, Matt, Dayle, Sarah, John). Only five picked UNLV - (Dana, Scott, Bill, DaveW and DavidP). All in all, a fairly even distribution of geniosity (geniusness? genitude? what's the word I want here?)

Sunday Special Super Genius Guys are Scott (again), Dayle and DaveW. These boys picked an obnoxious 7 of 8 games right. That's astonishing, says me. Especially that lanky Milwaukeean, Scott Silet. Do you realize that he picked 13 of 16 Round Two games correctly? No surprise then that he's spanking the field. Someone needs to rise up and smite him, verily. On the other hand, since I can't win, do I really care who does? I might go with sour grapes as the theme of my 2007 pool participation.

Anyway, here's where we stand after two rounds:


-------------Sat----Sun---Round Two Total
1. Silet 42 14 56
2. Dayle 37 14 51
3. Bill 38 12 50
3. Matt 38 12 50
5. DavidP 39 10 49
5. Favs 39 10 49
5. John 37 12 49
8. Gena 35 12 47
8. Ruth 37 10 47
10. Kate 40
6 46
10. Steve 38 8 46
12. Henry 38 6 44
13. Hank 37 6 43
14. Dana 32 10 42
14. Dykes 34 8 42
14. Knott 34 8 42
17. Calvino 35 6 41
17. DaveW 27 14 41
19. Sarah 30 10 40
20. Mike 29 10 39
21. Liz 32 6 38
22. Maggi 26 10 36
23. Alexander 25 8 33
24. Acy 26 6 32
24. Rosalie 22 10 32
26. Willow 21 8 29


Later this week I'll send out a chart of who has picked whom for the Thursday and Friday games. I probably ought to do a little work now.

Yours in Poolishness,

CAK

Saturday, March 17, 2007

Day Three results and current standings

Dear ones,

A bad day for the Meister and his entire family. We're all languishing at the bottom of the field; as clear an example of anti-Yankee bias as you could ever hope to see.

Scott Silet retains his (admittedly slim) lead, but the big story of the day are the two megaminded mensa mavens who picked a gaudy 7 of 8 games correctly. Matt Peterson is one of today's geniuses, and he has rocketed into a tie for 5th place. More interesting (not to say disgusting) is Newbie Kate's 7 of 8 performance today, which catapults her into second place behind Scott. The Milwaukee power couple is coming perilously close to running away from the rest of the field. I can almost hear their cruel, mocking laughter at our expense. Let's get 'em!

------------Rnd 1 Today Total
1. Silet 30 12 42
2. Kate 26 14 40
3. DavidP 29 10 39
3. Favs 27 12 39
5. Bill 28 10 38
5. Henry 28 10 38
5. Matt 24 14 38
5. Steve 28 10 38
9. Dayle 25 12 37
9. Hank 25 12 37
9. John 27 10 37
9. Ruth 25 12 37
13. Calvino 23 12 35
13. Gena 25 10 35
15. Dykes 24 10 34
15. Knott 26 8 34
17. Dana 24 8 32
17. Liz 22 10 32
19. Sarah 22 8 30
20. Mike 21 8 29
21. DaveW 21 6 27
22. Acy 20 6 26
22. Maggi 22 4 26
24. Alexander 19 6 25
25. Rosalie 18 4 22
26. Willow 17 4 21

Better games today. That, and the fact that we cooked a really good pot of chili today (in response to all the chilichatter on the blog) made it a good day. Mostly, though, it was that our driveway shoveling guy showed up in his truck today and removed about a foot of snow from the driveway. Love that dude.

Tomorrow is another chance for me to sink in the standings. Be safe out there. Keep your eye on Scott and Kate. I think a flaming bag of poop on the doorstop is a few correct picks away. Beware!

C

Indiana v. UCLA

So far this is shaping up to be one of the worst basketball games of the tournament. 1st half total points....33. That's for both teams.

It's like watching my kid's team.

Correction: The most wonderful person in the world